Staff Top 5's of 1995

KRIS GILLESPIE

  1. Babe
  2. The High Llamas' Gideon Gaye
  3. Wendy's opening down the block
  4. Living In Oblivion
  5. Auto Da Fé at Brownie's

RUSTY CLARKE

Top 5 Retail Moments (in no particular order)
  • Used Kids, Columbus OH - Bela's grandmother's two-cap hangover cure
  • In Your Ear, Boston - The "Conrad Capistran fired for stealing" phone prank
  • Tom's Tracks, Providence RI - Short ship allegation prior to actually opening the box
  • Record Swap, Naperville IL - Todd Ambrosini's daredevil attempt to circumvent two shoplifters
  • Mondo Kim's, New York - The boar's head stuffed with 100 dollar bills at bizarre opening party.

J.S. GAER

  1. Jon Spencer Blues Explosion - Academy, New York
    Show ends when, after the encore, a stagediver hits the floor with a thud. Spencer chuckles.
  2. Shellac - Westbeth Theatre, New York
    Chicago trio use old George Halas formation that has not been seen since Zagar & Evans
  3. Blacktop - I Got a Baaad Feelin About This
    After accumulating $983.57 in parking tickets ex-Gories Mick Collins gets his car out of the police lot with this LP
  4. The Upper Crust - Coney Island High, New York
    "I hope you are all enjoying this soiree. Love is never having to say soiree." --Lord Bendover
  5. Cat Power - Swathmore College
    Riot starts after sub-grade Fois Gras is served in dining room. Cat Power single handily gets campus swoon. Disaster averted.
  6. Charlambides - Cooler, New York & Market Square LP
    The Texas-based group create an ethereal dreamworld in an old slaughter house. Both appropriate and abbatoiresque.
  7. Borbetomagus/Shakin' Ray Levis - Swathmore College After bands play a combined encore riot restarts. The French and Dance departments are burned to the ground.
  8. Chris Knox - Brownies, New York and Songs of You & Me
    The Kiwi imp spins a magical pop spell. Many claim to be missing their wallets after the gig.
  9. Mekons - Mercury Lounge, New York
    By the third encore the air is thick with the acrid smoke of yuppies burning their Mastercards and Visas. The Mekons don't take American Express. Think about it.
  10. Shadowring/Dirty Three - The Cooler, New York
    Shadowring show what the English get up to when there are no sheep about. Dirty Three play the music made for the "Outback Speedball" - 6 cans of Foster's and 2 tabs of Acid. Shaken not stirred.
    Bonus Track: British Noir/Warhol Retrospective Film Forum, New York
    These are combined because Warhol was just remaking the dark British classics. An 8-hour shot of the Empire State Building is very close to the excitement level of an English pub on a Sunday. And Waterworld , proving once and for all that Kevin Costner has more holes in his head than the rest of us.

PATRICK AMORY

  1. The Queen Of Spades
  2. 1900
  3. Bar D'O
  4. Safe
  5. The Power Broker

DAN VARENKA

  1. Marital bliss
  2. Cheesecake
  3. Iceland, the friendly country
  4. Potatoes
  5. Turkey (sandwiches, burgers, stuffed)
  6. Babe
  7. Queens, NY
  8. Swedes...heck, Scandinavians as a whole
  9. Eggs
  10. Burnt By the Sun

CHRISTINA ZAFIRIS

  1. Gold 1974 Pontiac Firebird w/ T-top and mag wheels (Jim Rockford)
  2. White Ford Mustang 2 with dark blue accents (Sabrina Duncan)
  3. General Lee - Rust red 1969 Dodge Charger (Bo and Luke Duke)
  4. Red 1974 Ford Torino (Starsky and Hutch)
  5. Black 1985 Chevy Trans Am with Joy-stick steering wheel (Michael Knight)
  6. Off-white 1968 Volkswagon Beetle (Herbie)

BRETT VAPNEK

Five reasons I didn't quit working at Matador
  1. Free Coffee
  2. The pay is great!
  3. It's cool to be on the guestlist.
  4. Everyone here is so UP.
  5. Convenient location

CARRIE McLAREN

Top 5 Internet Alternatives
  1. Ride bike
  2. Talk to people
  3. Sit around, blame things on the robot
  4. Country Teasers
  5. Refill vaporizer

JESPER EKLOW

  1. Monica Zetterlund - Ett Lingonris Som Satts I Cocktailglas 6CD box (BMG/RCA) [music]
  2. v/a - Them Dirty Blues 2CD (Stash) [music]
  3. Lars Gullin - 1951-53 LP (Tip) [music]
  4. Findus Canned Fish Balls in Dill Sauce [food]
  5. The Eat - "Hialeah" 7" (Jeterboy) [music]
  6. Deborah Orr [a woman]
  7. OLW Cheeze Doodles [snacks]
  8. Calvin Trillin - Alice, Let's Eat [book] A Swingers Guide to Copenhagen [book]
  9. Bäska Droppar Akvavit [liquor]

MARK OHE

  1. 1996
  2. Pasta
  3. Orange - JSBE
  4. Terry Zwigoff's Crumb
  5. Spoon
  6. City Folk" @ Holly Solomon
  7. "Mice Feel Nice (In My Room)" GBV

GERARD COSLOY

  1. Dump I Can Hear Music (Brinkman) and International Airport (Smells Like)
  2. Harry Pussy, they're not influenced by James Blood Ulmer
  3. Buh-Buh Ray Dudley, putting the extreme back in EXTREMELY RETARDED
  4. The Dead C. Whitehouse Comes Alive (Siltbreeze)
  5. The Notwist 12 (Community)
  6. SS Nomar Garciaparra, Trenton (AA), the Human Vacuum Cleaner (and he's not so bad on the field, either)
  7. Lorax. Arista Strungys is a prophet and I think you oughta listen.
  8. Homicide: Life On The Street, NBC, Fridays at 10 pm. Thanks to all NYC clubs for only booking bands that suck on this night.
  9. The Tower Recordings Rehearsals For Roseland (Superlux)
  10. Thomas Jefferson Slave Apts Bait & Switch (Onion). Would've been #1 but the singer is too shy.

SPENCER GATES

  1. Tea with Burt Bacharach and Pizzicato Five
  2. Meeting Peter Dayton from legendary Boston punk rock band La Peste
  3. Traveling with Pavement on the Lollapalooza tour
  4. Seeing Al Green preaching up a storm at his church in Memphis
  5. Sorry but four is enough.

FRANK LONGO

  1. Raymond Pettibon @ David Zwirner Gallery
  2. Crumb
  3. Country Teasers Pastoral Not Rustic
  4. Dub Narcotic "Fuck Shit Up" 7"
  5. American Self Taught @ the Newark Museum

CHRIS LOMBARDI

Top 5 Recent Tastee Eating Experiences
  1. DiNardo's crabs (Philadelphia)
  2. Pat's cheese steaks (Phil.)
  3. Joe's Shanghai (Queens)
  4. Phillipes French dip (L.A.)
  5. Raclette w/bunderfliesch (my house)

DEBORAH ORR

Top 6 Things I Didn't Understand in 1995
  1. PJ Harvey's album and why everyone loves it.
  2. A&R armies -- Following the trend of Geffen A&R man Luke Wood and his signed-to-Geffen band Sammy, A&R folks will have to start their own bands just to give themselves someone to take out to dinner.
  3. Why SF archaeologist Joel Selvin still has a job writing about pop music.
  4. The Dirt folder on AOL.
  5. Steve Forbes' flat tax
  6. Being called "Debbie." No!

ALAN LICHT

TOP 5 (see also: Top 10 Celebrities Who Look Exactly Like Alan Licht)
  1. Recording with Haino Keiji, Connie Burg, and Melissa Weaver in a church in Chelsea
  2. Lyle's brown windbreaker
  3. The wrath of Joe Puleo (as unleased at Moe, Seattle, 10/95)
  4. Palace drummer strangling Oberlin College soundman
  5. Tortoise at Under Acme; Ghost at the Knitting Factory; Bob Dylan and Patti Smith at the Beacon

BOTTOM

  1. The Music Building, 8th Ave. NYC
  2. Pier Platters closing
  3. Subway token increase
  4. OJ trial didn't last long enough
  5. Patti Smith's bass player