by Carrie McLaren

You know, we could write more articles about how magazines suck, how radio sucks, how video channels suck, how we're all slave to the dollar... but where would that get us? If there's one thing worse than working in the music industry it's sitting around complaining about it. But that's not what we're about. We read that Neil Strauss article, we know "what time it is." And when the doorbell rings, we answer it...

So instead of continuing to pursue the Spin generation, we're going to start reaching out to an audience who'll pay attention: "generation Y"--grade schoolers. Music sales may be heading down the tubes, but gummi fruit, sneakers, and canned potato chips are up in a big way!

Naturally I'm skeptical of blanket categorizations, but this make sense. According to Madison Avenue, the hottest marketing venue these days--next to the internet--is schools. All the major players--Nike, Warner Brothers, Disney, KFC, Apple, Hershey, Nabisco, Oreos, etc.--are advertising in schools via book covers, gym floors, walls, benches, buses, and on TV. Some even provide textbooks and class materials to teachers free of charge!

Of course, shifting our business strategy to target school kids is a pretty dramatic move for Matador but... what the hell... it took Disney seven years to turn a profit, it's time for Matador to!

To get an idea of our options, I contacted Peter Zollo, president of Teenage Research Unlimited and Kids Research Unlimited, consultants to the stars: Levi's, Nintendo, Parker Brothers, Coca-Cola, Sony, you name it. One of Zollo's specialties is identifying "cool." When interviewing kids, he prefers to talk to "the coolest." As Zollo writes, "Why waste time and money asking teens whose opinions don't matter?"

Mr. Zollo wouldn't return my call (should've said I was from Sub Pop) but his book Wise Up to Teens was pretty informative. It has plenty of lists, for one thing:

Teen Trends
Safe for Marketing Use

Knowing what's "in" and what's "out" can help you avoid some of the pitfalls in advertising and marketing to teens Alternative music
Baggy clothes
Baseball caps
Black clothes
Caring about the environment
College clothing
College sports
Computers
Curly hair

etc. etc.

---

Teen Fads:
Unafe for Marketing Use

Trends are safe, and recommended, in teen marketing. Fads are inherently unstable and dangerous.

1960s things
1970s things
Babysitting
Being a vegetarian
Being patriotic
Being politically correct
The word "babe"
The word "bogus"
The word "chillin"

etc. etc.

A couple big problems here: Channel One's so-called captive audience isn't rich and white enough for us (schools with financial problems are those most likely to take advantage of what Channel One has to offer). Yet advertising on Channel One is more expensive than on prime-time TV. This may be fine if you're Reebok, but our Mecca Normals, Liz Phairs, etc., need to sell several million records before this becomes a viable option.

Unfortunately, limited formats (Best of the Charts, oldies, country, Fiesta) combined with inappropriate font usage, tacky plastic binding, and several typographic errors, made Star a poor choice for a business partner.

I kept looking, investigating other media, and collecting media kits. Lifetime Learning Systems used a variety of media to reach kids in school. Lifetime is owned by the same corporation that owns Channel One, K-III (which, btw, also owns The Weekly Reader, Seventeen, and numerous other media)...which means, obviously, they're way too expensive for us. Still, they sent a ton of interesting info.

Also got some good ideas from MarketSource's teen marketing program, the cleverly named HighSchoolSource. One media kit in particular stood out, though: Cover Concepts reaches an impressive 31,000 elementary, middle, and high schools (they even have an advertising program for pre-schoolers, a newsletter called SafeSteps). Basically, they give out book covers by M&M's, McDonald's, Nike, Pringles, Reebok, Clearasil, Noxema, and other companies to schools. Kids appreciate the humorous characters, award-winning design, and colorful graphics--a marked improvement over drab shades of grocery bag. And, since book covers are required by most school districts to increase the life span of texts, administrators love them, too.

Cover Concepts sent me a batch of samples and I was especially impressed at the number of companies promoting a positive, socially responsible message. Lightbulb! I realized Matador shouldn't simply invest in advertising to kids but undertake a full-on public service campaign... which was convenient since New York--like many municipalities--requires that advertising in schools convey a positive message.

We considered several options--don't do drugs; save the earth; be kind, rewind; stop AIDS, etc.--but the only one we didn't argue about was "stay in school." (How better to reach the kids?) Once that was decided, we were ready to proceed.

Unfortunately for ¡Escandalo! readers, specific information about Matador's "stay in school" campaign is confidential. If you want to know more about this stuff, ask someone else. Our contract allows me only to mention vaguely descriptive summaries. These are identified as the "three phrases" by marketing director Christina Zafiris:

1. MASCOT
   An animated bull named Björk (no relation to the Icelandic singer) will serve as spokesperson, role model, and intermediary between Matador and the audience.

2. CELEBRITY ENDORSEMENTS
   Artists on the roster will help promote the "stay in school" message, countering the public perception of Matador as an unfriendly, self-interested company.

3. EDUTAINMENT
   Give out sponsored curriculum material and lesson plans free to schools. Promote message that Matador + Learning = Fun!

   Fun continues: Stay in School Yearbook and Sample Classwork Activities