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NAME:
Accutron 2000
(the Matador robot)
HOME: 676 Broadway
PROFESSION: Head of A&R, marketing, promotion,
sales, publicity, radio, video, shipping and custodial departments,
Matador Records.
DRINK OF CHOICE: Motor oil
MOST MEMORABLE BOOK: (tie) Hits 9th Anniversary Issue
/ Manhattan Yellow Pages
FAVORITE PICK-UP LINE: "Why don't you come up to the
office after the show... I've got 'Demon Seed' on laserdisc."
OBJECT OF DESIRE: Ally Sheedy (who is also a robot)
FAVORITE BAND: Kraftwerk
ACHILLES HEEL: Instantly disabled whenever the voice
of radio host Chris Russo is heard.
PRIZED
POSESSION: Lee Atwater's brain
PET PEEVES: Assholes pretend they mistake me for Robocop,
what a riot.
LAST ACCOMPLISHMENT: Wrote 12 songs for the new Roxette
album.
PROFILE:
The friends of Matador share
a vision with the label's suave record company executives.
Accutron 2000 has volunteered to do this Matador Profile ad
without payment. The Youth of America has been in a slump
for almost a decade, and Accutron wouldn't have it any other
way. "Your puny intellect and pathetic human emotions are
no match for me!" it intones. "So, do you want regular or
decaf?"
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